After careful study, using my 2-year-old daughter Willa as the subject, I have come up with the following guidelines on how and when to use bandages.
For "boo-boo" that have made your child cry:
1. Use a new, brightly colored bandage.
2. If crying continues, try using a bigger bandage with a different picture.
3. If the cut is barely noticeable, repeat Step 1 every couple of hours for the next few days.
For a "boo-boo" that has you convinced you need new glasses:
1. Simply hand the child the entire box of bandages.
2. Add bandages to the shopping list.
When all else fails:
Threaten to take the child to the emergency room doctor now that it's 11:30 at night and the kid has complained unrelentingly about it for the past 4 hours, as what little patience you had a while ago has been completely drained away and you've decided there and then never to have more children and you struggle not to run out in the street in your underwear screaming wildly just so the police will lock you up for a night of peace and quiet ...
Happy sweeping!
Bob Gunther
Webmaster, ContestHound.com
